Friday, December 28, 2012

Our 2013 prediction: JLo dumps Casper for famous co-star

Jennifer Lopez is very predictable. She is so predictable that Exposarazzi is going on the record with what's to come in 2013 for the 43-year old entertainer. She is going to sign up to do a movie, (now that she's done touring and no longer on American Idol) and will fall deeply in love with whomever her co-star is on that flick. How do we know? Because there is literally an expiration date tattooed on Beau "Casper" Smart's head, he just can't see it. He should be looking into her past to see his future.
On her first steps towards stardom after playing Selena on the big screen, she hit on a Cuban waiter named Ojani Noa who was serving her party. Months later they married. The pendulum swung towards a famous man when she cheated on hubby #1 with Sean "P Diddy" Combs, later dumping her husband for the rapper. Then a nightclub shooting soured their romance, sending her into the arms of down to earth and unknown back-up dancer Cris Judd. She and hubby #2 Cris were married, and just months into the marriage she was already fooling around, with a then married singer Marc Anthony. But Anthony was just a brief diversion, until she hooked up with her Gigli co-star Ben Affleck. Cris Judd was kicked to the curb, and within a year she was engaged to Affleck. But getting him to the altar was no easy trick, and he wiggled out of his harness just a week before their wedding date. Embarrassed and humiliated at being dumped, she went back to Marc Anthony (hubby #3) whose divorce from a former Miss Universe was only one week old when they wed. Famous to un-famous men, she swings back and forth, and back-up dancer Casper, 18-years her junior, broke, homely, dumb as a box of rocks, is not going to make it til the end of the year, in fact, we say May 2013 is when he is sent packing.