The EMPIRE is crumbling! Even Slobert Kardashian has been given an assignment

His assignment from Mama Kris? "Stir up the media and make them think you have a love child!" 

Dude, you ARE the USS Enterprise

Robert Kardashian continues to lament the fact that he's large, and not in charge...

Good thing Rob Kardashian is going bald, he can plug new $ponsor!

Gypsy Mama Kris Jenner doesn't want her son Rob Kardashian to be shut out of the family money making schemes, so she found a sponsor for him.

Kris Jenner makes Us Weekly bow down

So, if you're Us Weekly mag and you want to cover Kim Kardashian's baby shower, and Kourtney Kardashian's bikini body pics and story, it means you have to do articles that no one cares about that promote that other Kardashian ---Rob.
Does anyone care about this loser? NO, but madam Kris Jenner makes the mags do fluff pieces on this half-wit if they want to get the good stuff on her prize pigs.
Is there anyone out there that even wants to know ONE thing about Rob Kardashian?
Well, here's some REAL facts:
1. My father, attorney Robert Kardashian Sr helped OJ Simpson get away with killing his ex-wife and a young waiter during the 'trial of the century' in 1995.
2. My family fakes everything on their reality show, including duping a dumb basketball player named Kris Humphries into marrying my sister Kim on TV so our family could literally rake in the cash.
3. My sister Kim and my mom inked a seven figure deal on the release of her sex tape with ex-boyfriend Ray J Norwood.
4. I have a sock line at Neiman Marcus where they sell for $30 a pop, I just put my name on them because my mom Kris wanted me to be doing something, anything for a living.
5. I lied about going to law school.

We could go on, but just the name Robert Kardashian sends us to snoozeville...

Fake pap shots, used as "advertorial" vanity shots in magazines

So my friends, what is an "advertorial" plug? It's when you do a staged set-up with an agency like Startraks and are paid not only for the photo, but to plug a certain item like "Popchips" or "Simple Skincare Cleansing Facial Wipes." It's a win-win situation for the product, after all, they don't have to shell out big bucks for the advertising pages, and if it's used, it goes in the editorial side with a celeb face attached. If "Michael Simon" is credited with taking the photo, you can bet it's staged. Our favorite is how Simon managed to sneak into Rob Kardashian's back yard to snap him using "Dentyne Split2Fit" (whatever the heck that is)!!